The Trusteeship IMID  Historical Treatments

Identity Technology

The Water Treatment

Nightmare in a bottle

Circa 1973

While the 'water treatment' seemed unnecessary, it really put us in our place. We were made to go - and in no uncertain terms - had to. We were also made aware of how powerful a stop-cock can be! And, because flooding of the colon adds fluids to the bloodstream, one was made to go not only at the time of treatment, but also as soon as you're relaxed enough to sleep. So, not only do you have to go, but you can't go there, and an alarm in your bed will wake if you do.

So while the administration of the procedure wasn't a memorable event for me, I did get involved in movements of various kinds, and I worked on advocacy for patients to have the right to refuse treatment, and be free from restraints, especially because some seemed to serve doctors more effectively than patients. And others worked on the procedure itself, debating the proper height for the placement of the bag: "3, or 5 feet above the patient?", etc. Privacy rules resulted so we couldn't be accountable for the practice, and all kinds of nightmares could be conjured up by the toddler who received the treatment. Advocacy isn’t without cost either, as one of our advocates may have died to address this problem in Brazil, with John of God.

To bemoan the lesson taught by such a practice is to ignore the fact that some thrive on the power to control themselves while others get diseased trying to live with it. And, just because we have the skill to do so doesn't mean that we can teach others how to do so. I’m sure that living with someone who cannot, or will not adhere to the most basic sanitary guidelines of behavior is as unbearable as being unable to do so for ourselves, so while it may be difficult to teach bathroom habits, it's still well worth the effort. And accounting for the details may be essential to one who is confused by the memory, or others who are suspicious enough to challenge us. Please see: Transpositions.


Bodywork by Advait School

Dakini Shakti Malan

Dakini Shakti Malan

3 Minutes and 40 seconds into this video, Shakti Malan describes the problem of providing an enema as a form of treatment to a boy. Please see: Treating Trauma [i].

The Limits of Human Intervention

The tragedy about artistic recreations of ourselves is that we don’t really get to be ourselves again. As soon as we set out on our mission to become someone or something, we become victims of our own modifications. The fact is that most of our time and effort ends up codified in a DSM, even if it is just our effort to cope with the judgments others have made. And judgements used to prove that our ways don’t work, prevent us from being able to reach them in a world that does so without the benefit of our ability to cope. So these documents were drafted to reach them with information they’ll need to adapt when those who don’t understand our ancestry, or way of life find that they're unable to teach what we already know.

It’s here online that the battle will be won or lost, and here - online, that information is used most effectively. And however frail, and imperfect our steps are to becoming what it is we dream we can be, the structures we're working on provide safe space to construct our own vision, and provide practical understanding for the perspectives of others. I’m sure that I cannot heal or conceive of what needs to be done without it.

Our freedom to live freely may have been largely denied to protect those who’s suspicions may have invalidated us, but had I been allowed to continue with my own concerns, counter claims would’ve likely murdered us. I didn't realize that even my suspicions were deadly when I spoke them, but have been taught for most of my life to learn to communicate carefully, and strenuously if ever at all. Like a velvet needle, we don’t always fully understand the consequences of an action until much later, and the time we spend to fully comprehend them is often a painful loss. The censorship and restraint we encounter in the world today is proof of the fact that very few of us are well prepared to do so. Despotism and rage as madness are designed to do so, but are far more expensive.

Please see: Fascism and Censorship

When the despot dies, his reign ends.

Soren Kierkegaard.

When the martyr dies, his reign begins."


"Since I am incompetent and completely undependable, I speak the truth, and thereby place them in a predicament that only the truth can extricate them from."

~Søren Kierkegaard

A man who for a long time has gone around hiding a secret becomes mentally deranged. His secret must come out despite his derangement, but his soul still sticks to its hideout. He remains present, and his disorder is healed because he believes nothing has been betrayed, and he knows everything that has gone on because he tells God, who by acquaintance with the problem can help him correct his perception to return to be present in the community of his peers without his angst.

Here, just as we do, Søren does 'the work':

Original Draft: "What I really need is to get clear about what I must do, not what I must know, except insofar as knowledge must precede every act."

(This is considered to be one of the earliest statements of existentialist thought.)

Later variant:

"What I really lack is to be clear in my mind what I am to do, not what I am to know, except insofar as a certain knowledge must precede every action."

True consciousness is mind and spirit, and in the realm of spirit, the self is divided. Doubt separates the self from itself, and opens up to spirit, making three: the self observing the self reflecting upon itself.

Because it is clear that as soon as my mind and spirit become two, the observer makes three. The doubt belies a third that places the two in relation to each other.

We feel free to doubt what we think in order to separate ourselves from our entanglements and arrive at a formula for which there is no despair at all: "The self in relation to itself rests transparently in the power that created it.". We can live with our thoughts, even when they are motivated by an objective point of view.

To deny God's truth, or the truth of an objective self, is to avoid, or surrender oneself to the opinion of others. Without confessions in madness, or what others might perceive to be madness, such as confessions before God, the opinion of others is all that God would really know about us. If what seems to be clear to others is clear to us, then we will be able to help ourselves.

Sadly, there is no God apart from His creation, and no forgiveness without His people. To continue to reject life because we made a mistake is a very serious problem, even a condemnation of life, ourselves, and maybe even creation. To reject what God gave us and call it a failure, is to fail ourselves and the gifts we were given. Some of the most important work we been given is the correction of the things that have been revealed to us as wrong. Because it's an objective point of view, the only way to resolve it is to do the work required of us to become useful with what we believe has been wrong.

Without forgiveness, we cannot escape our own rejection, and resulting conflict with others. Not even by fleeing can we regain the joy of living. We must regain acceptance within ourselves and others by correcting the wrongs that have been revealed to us, and amending our resulting mistakes.

We confess our sins to God and one another so God knows us well enough to help us before He concludes that 'what they say' about us is true, and there's nothing more to it than that.

Paraphrased ~Søren Kierkegaard


1. Dakini Shakti Malan PhD. 2009: 3 Minutes and 40 seconds into this YouTube video, Shakti Malan discusses the problem of treating a young boy with a colonic. Releasing Sexual Trauma